Most of us have had an experience in our lives where we had trouble walking away from something. That something usually involves a relationship with another or a career. We try to “stick it out” because we see good things in there we want to help “change” someone or we have been told your time is coming. Alot of times the person that gets changed is us. We lose others. We continue to get hurt. We chase a title or a larger payday. We don’t see the person who is trying to help us. We are afraid to walk away because of many thoughts, at the top of most lists is we don’t want to be the bad guy. We have become so consumed with how we want others to see or think of us that we will continue to be unhappy and not chase after the things that brighten our day. We let opportunities pass us by because we have become comfortable.
Being in the position I’m in with so many things I often get to talk to people who struggle with the above paragraph. I myself have struggled with the above. I was in a position for over six years where I told continuously your time is coming, be patient, trust us. I let others dictate my path during that time instead of taking hold of the steering wheel myself. Yet then would complain about where I was at. Why haven’t I advanced? My thoughts, my pity for myself didn’t help me climb higher up the ladder. It often takes a hardship for us to stop and look in the mirror to gather ourselves and say why have I not walked away. Why have I let someone or something control me? Does it really matter what or how others look at me, if I can’t look at myself in the mirror? We put on a facade for others. We show an exterior happiness with an internal collapse.
For many they long for that relationship or that career that they have always dreamed of. Yet if there’s a bump in the road they will take a detour to a place of unhappiness. They will latch onto things that upset or break them down. They can see the road they want to travel on but are afraid to take that drive. For some its selfishness that gets in the way. They don’t want to share themselves with others. They think they can handle everything on their own, yet get upset when they need help. I struggle with this. I coached for years and “had” to do the scheduling, field work, communication, etc. It began to wear on me to the point I no longer enjoyed something that I truly love to do. We beat ourselves up trying to do everything when there is someone there wanting to help. We all have a person in our corner in good times and bad, we just don’t always allow ourselves to see them. Sometimes we push them away, not always intentionally.
I recently had a conversation with the topic of being patient, your time is coming. I left the conversation upset, however I gathered myself. I returned and expressed my displeasure. I spoke on having been down that path and that I wasn’t going down it again. I was going to take control of my steering wheel and take control of where I wanted my path to be. We all handle our paths differently. I recently got to see someone take control of their wheel after letting go of it for awhile. They were falling apart on the inside because they were afraid to walk away. They let things not controlled by them pull the strings. It’s a struggle. Being the bad guy is a place that many aren’t comfortable being. Use the opportunity to trust in yourself and the person that has been in your corner the whole time. They didn’t throw the towel in for you so don’t do it yourself. That person in your corner will most likely become your co-pilot in life. I have been lucky to have a great co-pilot for almost half my life. There’s been bumps and disagreements on the drive but there’s been so much joy and happiness along the way.
Enjoy your day and take hold of your steering wheel!
TCB