We have all had an event, going through an event or will face an event that makes an impact on our life. That event is something for many we question, Why did this happen to me? On the flip side, the event could be something that brings someone into your life that you have been longer for. We often don’t see it coming or know how it came to be.
For me I can’t help but go back to an event that in two days will have happened 22 years ago. Yes, that is Halloween, in 1997 I was playing Strong Safety for my high school. We were playing one of our rivals in Pikeview. It was the Second Quarter on 2nd down and 10 they run a sweep to the right, I read it and come up and make the tackle. On that play everything changed though. Upon making the tackle I went through the blocker and the running back when we all landed I took a cleat to the spine. When I went to stand everything was numb from the waist down. I tried to tap my helmet to signal I needed to come out, no-one saw it. Pikeview lined up to run their next play. For me it was a blessing they ran to the other side. I felt like I was running in quick sand to get to that side of the field and then to the side line for the punt team to come out. I had one Coach who noticed something was wrong, in fact he met me on the field before I got to the sideline. Coach Mustain grabbed me and said what’s wrong. I told him everything was numb after making the tackle. He lifted my jersey and I”ll never forget the look on his face. He immediately yelled for Ballengee. When I reached to feel my back I already had a knot the size of a softball on my lower back. He iced it and I went to the hospital where after some testing it was noted I had knocked a vertebrae out of line. Once I got home from the hospital that night I sat in my bed crying, asking why did this happen.
This event helped shape my mindset moving forward. No one called me that night to check in. Coach Mustain called the next morning and for the last 22 years continues to check in on me. That man has had a major impact in my life and words can’t begin to express my gratitude. My position coach also called the next day, but no one else did. I would now have to miss my last game in high school, which to this day is still the hardest thing for me to come to grips with. I was in street clothes for my senior night. I had made a commitment to the team and myself. I felt like I let both down for a long time after. However, I did hear comments from some parents that questioned my injury and why I didn’t play. Often times that is what happens with an event, we hear others two-cents for something that impacts us. One comment still sits with me even after almost 22 years, Are you scared to play? You’re walking fine, I don’t think you’re that hurt. It got to me, in fact it still gets to me. The doctor told me if I were to play and take another hit like I did I may never walk again.
I was able to play basketball and baseball that year and finish out my high school career. However the dreams I had of playing at the next level and beyond came to an end. A 17 year old with a back problem isn’t high on anyone lists. As I look back each year at Halloween the first thing I see is that play. For whatever reason, the paper put that tackle on the front page of the sports page. So in addition to having that play and picture in my head I also have a hardcopy of what happened. If I don’t get hurt do I get an opportunity to play at the next level. It’s a question I thought about for years. Right after the injury I gave up on myself, I let the pain and fear of what I would have to do to fix the issue impact me for some time. When you have people who constantly cheer, support and are in your corner it makes a huge difference. I was told I would have to have surgery to fix the injury. The idea of having back surgery scared me and it was something I feared. I decided that I would do everything in my power to strengthen myself both physically and mentally. No one else was feeling sorry for me, so I needed to stop doing it myself.
There’s a movie called Mr. Destiny, where James Belushi character felt like would be different, when he was 15 and struck out in a game. He makes a wish on his 35th birthday, goes back to that event, hits a homerun and his life changes. However, he soon realizes that the life he had was the one he wanted all along. For me it’s a great reminder. I used to play out in my head what would have happened if I didn’t get hurt. Would things have changed? Where would I have ended up? I played that scenario out in my head for years. However, I look back on the last 22 years and see that I’m right where I want to be. I was able to meet my wife at college. I look at our kids, my career and the path I have been on. The coaching, the kids, the people and events I have been apart of. Each day is a great reminder of how lucky I have been.
For some their event changes everything. Some are going through that event now and feel lost. They are asking why. Now that no matter how hard your event is. You will have someone in your corner. You will have someone supporting you. You will have someone cheering you on. There are times that you may have to be your biggest cheerleader. You’re life may change because of the event and it may change for the better.
Enjoy your day and hopefully your event.
TCB